This website is not mobile compatable and was created to be read in order, in one sitting, or it won't be effective.

What
Happened
To
Us?

If you are visiting this site,
it means someone you love
feels like the two of you are
experiencing a change
in your relationship,
a change that scares them,
or hurts them, or confuses them,
a change that makes
them feel incomplete...
A change that makes them ask,
"What Happened to Us?"

Explain Exactly What Steps Need to be Taken to fix "Us"

  1. Was it Your Fault?
    Probably, but it's not my place to judge. Typically, the person who sends this link feels like they are in the wrong; not because they know what they did, but because their narcissism makes them feel as though everything is because of them.
  2. Can You Fix It?
    Most likely no. The reason I said it was your fault is because you let the relationship get this far. You should have realized sooner that you're with a narcissist. This might be your fault. But if you think this relationship is worth saving, keep reading.
  3. The "I Want Out" Test
    We all love the band Coldplay, especially their 2005 album "X&Y". However, if the person you love listens to this album more than an hour a week, they are most likely struggling with the relationship, and they will likely want out.

"What if I am the one who listens to Coldplay's 'X&Y' as I fall asleep? Does that mean I also miss us?"

Of course that is what it means. "Missing us" can be a shared feeling. Remember the days when you two would hold hands while walking through the grocery store? Remember when one of you made jokes about how the other one loves wearing pajamas too much? Remember when you both laughed at that horrible scary movie?

Those days are gone.

But good news:
If you miss those times, and the other person sent you to this site, then you both miss those times.

So how do we return to those times?

We don't. They're gone.

​So now what?

Now You Create a New Sense of "Us"

Start with forgiving yourself for letting the other person down.

Then forgive yourself for letting yourself down.

Here is an anecdotal example of how to rediscover and redefine love through these times:

My friend David used to run on the beach every morning with his dog, Milo. They did this for twenty years. Then Milo got sick and could no longer run, or even walk fast. The running on the beach ended. The way David and Milo would bond was destroyed.

So they had to find a new way to bond.

One day, David came home with a kick board for a swimming pool.

He took Milo into the pool and propped the old dog up onto the kick board.

Milo loved this new activity.

David and Milo never stopped loving each other,
it's just that their means of expressing love had been destroyed,
so they had to find a new avenue of sharing beautiful moments together.

Milo was a dog, and he figured it out,
so you can figure it out too.
Dogs are stupid.

"I Tried Contacting Them, and They Are Not Willing to Find a New Avenue for Love. Now What?"

Now you move on.

The relationship has ended, but so has the fighting.

Now love yourself,
and on the days you feel alone:
Click Here